By now you have undoubtedly heard of John Mayer's latest round of foot bullets via his interview with Playboy Magazine where he talks, and talks and talks..... about Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Simpson, his supposed racist dick, endless masturbation, complete with a N*gger mention, all that has everyone on the “internets” and beyond in quite a tizzy.

John “apologized” first on Twitter, saying,

“It’s such a shame that I [used the N-word] because the point I was trying to make was in the exact opposite spirit of the word itself. It was arrogant of me to think I could intellectualize using it, because I realize that there’s no intellectualizing a word that is so emotionally charged… I wanted to be a blues guitar player. And a singer. And a songwriter. Not a shock jock. I don’t have the stomach for it. Again, because I don’t want anyone to think I’m equivocating: I should have never said the word and I will never say it again. I just wanted to play the guitar for people.”

and then again his teary “apology” on stage in Nashville last night.

   

I put “apology” in quotation marks because as you've noticed, of his whole interview he seems to be apologizing only for the N word mention, but not for any of the other equally stupid things he said in the interview, or the people he slammed in that interview.

Reading the JM's interview, I couldn't help thinking that John Mayer is basically a regular (not evil) horny douche guy with an unfortunate penchant toward hoof-in-mouth disease. 

Stupid? yes, to the highest degree, not because he is not intelligent, given his many other interviews you know he's got some intelligence, he just lacks a formal education that would have helped him phrase his thoughts differently, less inflammatory, less ridiculously or stupidly as he tries to “shock” or stay relevant.

Racist? I think not. We all have to agree that its ok for John to say he's not attracted to black women, its a preference of his and that's ok. He may have chosen the WORST way of expressing that thought, choosing to declare his dick a card carrying, certified member of the KKK but that doesn't make him wrong or discriminatory… in fact his whole interview left me thinking John has a serious inferiority complex with a lack of self awareness to know that and so over compensates by being overly sexualized and completely self absorbed.

As for the N*gger mention? his quote sounded to me more in same spirit/vein as Harry Reid‘s infamous “Obama lacks the negro dialect, hence will be nominated and will win” quote, inarticulate yes, but true and not derived from racism, in fact quite contrary, John actually had a point to make on the “hood pass” thing, he just didn’t phrase it the best way he could, and that said, did someone give John Mayer the hood pass and no black person knew about that?

John now says he's done with media/interviews and just wants to play his guitar, well, go do that son.. the whole “shock” thing is not working for ya.

Click below to see highlights from John Mayer's interview with Playboy or as we call it here, his latest foot bullet.

On “entertaining” one self:

I’m a self-soother. The Internet, DVR, Netflix, Twitter—all these things are moments in time throughout your day when you’re able to soothe yourself. We have an autonomy of comfort and pleasure. By the way, pornography? It’s a new synaptic pathway. You wake up in the morning, open a thumbnail page, and it leads to a Pandora’s box of visuals. There have probably been days when I saw 300 vaginas before I got out of bed.

On “self-love:”

PLAYBOY: Masturbation for you is as good as sex?

MAYER: Absolutely, because during sex, I’m just going to run a filmstrip. I’m still masturbating. That’s what you do when you’re 30, 31, 32. This is my problem now: Rather than meet somebody new, I would rather go home and replay the amazing experiences I’ve already had.

PLAYBOY: You’d rather jerk off to an ex-girlfriend than meet someone new?

MAYER: Yeah. What that explains is that I’m more comfortable in my imagination than I am in actual human discovery. The best days of my life are when I’ve dreamed about a sexual encounter with someone I’ve already been with. When that happens, I cannot lay off myself.

On having a “hood pass:”

Someone asked me the other day, “What does it feel like now to have a hood pass?” And by the way, it’s sort of a contradiction in terms, because if you really had a hood pass, you could call it a nigger pass. Why are you pulling a punch and calling it a hood pass if you really have a hood pass? But I said, “I can’t really have a hood pass. I’ve never walked into a restaurant, asked for a table and been told, ‘We’re full.’"

On how he's kind of like a black person – because he suffers sometimes:

What is being black? It’s making the most of your life, not taking a single moment for granted. Taking something that’s seen as a struggle and making it work for you, or you’ll die inside. Not to say that my struggle is like the collective struggle of black America. But maybe my struggle is similar to one black dude’s.

On how his penis feels about black women:

I don’t think I open myself to it. My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock. I’m going to start dating separately from my dick.

On the attractiveness of black women:

I always thought Holly Robinson Peete was gorgeous. Every white dude loved Hilary from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. And Kerry Washington. She’s superhot, and she’s also white-girl crazy. Kerry Washington would break your heart like a white girl. Just all of a sudden she’d be like, “Yeah, I sucked his dick. Whatever.” And you’d be like, “What? We weren’t talking about that.”

On Jessica Simpson:

MAYER: That girl, for me, is a drug. And drugs aren’t good for you if you do lots of them. Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me.

PLAYBOY: You were addicted to Jessica Simpson?

MAYER: Sexually it was crazy. That’s all I’ll say. It was like napalm, sexual napalm.

PLAYBOY: But before you dated her you thought of yourself as the kind of guy who would never date Jessica Simpson.

MAYER: That’s correct. There are people in the world who have the power to change our values. Have you ever been with a girl who made you want to quit the rest of your life? Did you ever say, “I want to quit my life and just fuckin’ snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to fuck you, I would start selling all my shit just to keep fucking you.”

On “whores:”

I feel like women are getting their comeuppance against men now. I hear about man-whores more than I hear about whores. When women are whorish, they’re owning their sexuality. When men are whorish, they’re disgusting beasts. I think they’re paying us back for a double standard that’s lasted for a hundred years.

(hat tip: Blacksnob.com)

Thoughts?